Vickers spotted on the Royal Mile!

Playboys with Hunchbacks may be a blog based in Essex, but we have a very long arm. If Vickers thinks he can swan about in a big city without my spies getting back to me, he’s much mistaken. Here is a snap sent by a friend I’ve tried to initiate in all things Twonkey, taken on Saturday 17th September 2011. It would seem that Mr Vickers now lives in Scotchland. Either that or he’s still trying to earn his fare home since the Festival.

I’m going to go off on a tangent here, compare myself to Winston Churchill, the greatest of all Britons save Princess Diana, and mention The Omen (1976) no less than twice. Well, three times if you include that one. Remember The Omen? Not that pathetic remake they made just to release it on 06.06.06. I’m talking the original classic here. Photos taken of Patrick Troughton at first look pretty normal, but the photographer eventually spots that they include signs of sheer wickedness. Well, I had a similar moment of chill-inducing realisation looking at this here Twonkey pic, even if it wasn’t immediately obvious. Bear with me.

Hard as it is to believe in this era of Google Maps, etc, but back in the good old days before the Nazis got splatted, Winny Churchill had the UK East Coast covered with cardboard cutouts of warships. Cardboard! All they had to do, their entire function, was to be spotted at considerable range and scare the Nazis with our Imperial might. The Nazis. Cardboard!!! The Churchmeister asked to go see our cardboard defence with his own eyes and, with a keen intuition, spotted that something most definitely didn’t look right. Not the fact that the ships were made out of cardboard, oh no. There were no seagulls flying around them! He thought this was the sole reason our mighty defence would fail to fool those dastardly Nazis. I had that moment of Churchill-like clarity when viewing the Vickers photo. Not only were there no seagulls in the snap, but more worryingly there were no children! In the full photo, cropped here for your viewing enjoyment, there are 27 adults shown. 27! That means that there should be a corresponding amount of children too. But there aint. Not a one of ‘em. It’s almost as if the children could sense evil. Like the giraffes that run away from the antichrist in The Omen (1976). Coz they just know.

Anyways, I don’t want to turn this blog into Heat magazine with gossip, innuendo and illicit photographs. But at the same time, it’s what the fans want. If you are a former Big Brother contestant with stories of sexual depravity involving Mr Paul Vickers then we want to know. And if it was a free-for-all orgy also involving Katie Price and Max Mosely then we’ll pay top dollar. Discretion assured.

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